Why We Do Always Compare?

Your journey is your own. My journey is my own.

I know that I start my word too hard. Sounds easy, but hard to believe in. And sometimes we hate dislike to acknowledge it, isn't? *ups, hate is a strong word. sorry. But that is a fact, we often deny that our journey is different to others, then we continue to comparing and make it same with others. Oh, that's irony :( Because the journey of each people is obviously different. So I start my blog tonight by that statement. "Your journey is your own. My journey is my own." 

Maybe you start to think that I'm not creative enough to write a blog, because I use common sentences like that. Haha. Yes, you're right! I'm not good enough to write something motivated nor entertained like that. I'm just trying write everything that I feel in this recent day. I feel that this week is feels like: it's been draining my energy a lot, but exciting at the same time! Hm. So, this is my own journey. 

In this week, I hv been trying make a facies map, and do a lot of discussion with Pak Iqbal, Pak Latif, Pak Faizil, and also Kak Idham. I learn a lot from them. ((Kak Idham, thank you for becoming person who always encouraging and kind-hearted. I hope you realize that you have been a kind person who makes me feel welcome and a person who helps me to reduce my fear. Tencuu, you helped me to not be afraid to ask and questioning anything again.. thanks for taught me to be skeptical about anything until that proven otherwise!))

That was fun! And still fun until this day, I enjoy my learning process in here. To be added, I can help my junior to make him understand about his skripsi due to I learn a lot from Pak Faizil and Pak Iqbal. I'm happy, it feels great knowing my presence is useful to peeps around me. Alhamdulillah.. 

There are so much joy and happiness that I found while I study in PHR, I met a lot of great and kind-hearted person, and I feel new feeling that I can't define before. Maybe, it's called by "euphoria" of learning something new. But to be honest, at the first time  when I look at to other person who has same age with me and he/she has passed more experience than me, or has passed more step than me, I start to compare my self to others, and up with I feel bad. Instead of believing my self, I let my insecurities steer the first few days that I was here. Yess, the shadow of others succeed steer my self to let my fear grows. I start to become fear about everything and do not brave enough to face it. Astaghfirullaah.. *too sad to remembering that phase. It was hard on myself if I didn't understand something the first time around, like some others did. It took an even heavier toll on me when I looked around and compared my process with others. I start overplaying my weaknesses, believed   even convinced that others were more capable than I was :((

Hm. hhhhhh. *take a deeeeep breath. Last week, at my lowest, I decided to change my perspective, I decided to try to left it to Allah at the first. I try to be more tawakkal to Allah although it's hard to do. Because I realize that there is no power and effort apart from Allah. I'm convinced that Allah is source of all power. From that believe, I can find new perspective in face my learning process in here. I can see new standards and new problem as challenges. Remembering that I was in a good place to work and to learn, where I would continuously grow, improve, and learn, I start became comfortable in my learning environment, and quickly enjoy my process :)

So, why do always compare to others while we can focus to inside to find new perspective to face our fate and quickly enjoy our own journey in our life?

*pssst, omg, I don't expect I will close my blog by those sentences, wkwk. That sounds soo serious    although that's 'ada benernya juga' haha. Haaah, yaudah gitu aja kali ya, blogging kali ini. Aku mau lanjut ngerjain PR dari Pak Faizil lagi :) Be healthy and be happy yah guys!! Remember that the place of struggle is also a place where we will grow, learn, and improve. There is nothing desirable in feeling like the smartest person in room it may mean that you're not challenging yourself enough.

At least we have tried. If failure comes to our way, use the extra energy to fight back harder :)

The last, I wanna post some random pict in my week in here, because just I want   though I know there are not match with my topic above. I just wanna keep my week-dumb in here, besides my random thought.

Kemarin waktu renang sempet capture langit Rumbai, cantik banget Masya Allaah

Rencananya sih, sebelum generate facies map aku renang dulu. haha, gataunya kemarin kepala kejedot lantai, berujung pusing banget kepala akuu. Malemnya cuma kuat weekly meeting sama internal tim Undip, abis itu haha-hihi lanjut tidur. Tapi gapapa.

Hari minggu kemarin, akhirnya kesampaian juga main ama Memo-Intan ke Pekanbaru. Itu pun karena diajak Bang Noah ke Orion, haha, tencu Bang Noah dah ngasih banyak insight lewat diskusi random yang selalu menyenangkan!!

Tontonan minggu ini yang banyak ngebantu aku dalam meregulasi emosi, mengubah sudut pandang, dan menguatkan pola pikir. Makasih Mas Bagus Muljadi, dan the thoughful Bapak Gita Wirjawan!!

dan, terakhir, pict yang cukup mendominasi isi kepala:

Rumah. Ingin rasanya segera pulang. Barang sebentar.